It is funny to find people living in an artificial world where one's own perception lies deep in a bin and all that matters is the world's perception about you. I am sorry folks, but life isn't a "Truman Show".. I refuse to live my life according to someone else's policies, I have the strength and the guts to say "No". It is rather weird that we end up agreeing to someone else's opinions just to keep them happy. Kill our mind and do things that someone else wants us to do, accept a life full of despair coz someone somewhere will smile, but ultimately whom are we bluffing? The person who is temporarily happy that you accepted their whims, but will be hell shocked when realises the truth, or you who in the eternal quest to become the sacrificial hero, let go of the fundamental parameter that defines life "Happiness". You need not be self centred, but being practical, isn't necessarily being selfish.
Keeping others before you when you take a decision is selflessness, but to create a mess out of everyone's life, just to satisfy someone's whims is absolute freaky behaviour. I always believe in constructively discussing a problem situation out. Two mature and rational humans can always solve their difference of opinions by talking it out. There can be no problem which does not have a solution. Sacrificing and then ending up self sympathizing is not a solution, it is just a foundation to a whole new world of problems. I am a "Raat gayi, baat gayi" believer. I prefer ending a problem with a solution which is discussed about, then carrying its emotional baggage all through my life.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
A voyage undescribable!!
Travelling has always been a favourite past time of mine!! Discovering the unknown and doing something that you can never dream of, excites me more than anything. One such itch, led me to this Dindi yatra.
Although the goal of this journey was spiritual, the experience was divine in its own way. Dindi is a piligrimage undertaken by Maharashtrian warkaris, from Alandi and Dehu road, carrying the Padukas or sandals of the great marathi saints, Jnyandev and Tukaram to Pandharpur, the abode of Lord Vitthala. This piligrimage is done on foot, by thousands of devotees in the month of Ashadha, when the gates of heaven are considered open. The piligrims, reach, Pandharpur on Ashadhi Ekadeshi, where they take darshan of their Lord and thus fulfill, their desires. Being a mumbaichi mulgi, I have always been enchanted by the devotion and determination of these warkaris, and when I got a chance to be one amongst them, I jumped with glee..
Around 850, sai devotees from Maharashtra, walked from dharmavaram (in Andhra Pradesh) to Puttaparthy, the abode of Sri sathya sai baba. I was lucky to be one of the volunteers, taking care of these people while walking this distance of close to 40 Km. Although compared to the pandharpur dindi, which takes about 15 days to reach, we reached in a mere 2.5 days.. But the experience was beyond description.
Maximum crowd for the dindi came from rural maharashtra, from remote villages of Chandrapur, Parbhani, Wardha and also from cities like Nasik, kolhapur & Jalgaon. Being the youngest lady volunteer, I got a lot of chance to interact with these people, to know about their likes and dislikes. It is truly said that India lives in villages. To know the real Indian culture, one needs to visit and spend time in the hamlets of India. I always knew about virtues like humility and forgiveness in a very abstract manner... But I understood the real meaning of these virtues when I got a chance to mix amongst these people. Purity of heart is resplendent in every act of these people. We had women over the age of 60's walking as if there was no tomorrow. Singing the devotional folk songs about Lord Vitthoba and dancing in His glory, they made every minute of this endeavour rejoice able. we used to walk in the hot afternoons, and "Miss Fussy Unlimited" as my family knows me, when I saw the simplicity of these people, I didn't care about any of my logics.. Gone were my sun screen lotions in the depths of my bag, our legs ached, our bodies were sore, yet we ate only after confirming that every villager was fed to his heart's content. I never knew that I could manage to clean after walking for 16 Km, wait till 800 people ate, served them and then have food. It was as if all of us were rediscovering ourselves.
On one particular occasion, after walking a distance of 16 Km, we reached a hamlet, not far from our destination. The food arrived very late that night, we were all extremely exhausted, all the children, old women everyone was very hungry. But not a sound of cribbing anywhere... When we apologised to them, about the delay in the food a very old lady, with a smiling face said, "Vitthal has called us and he is the giver", you and I are mere instruments in his divine hands.
With tears in my eyes I served the lady food. She had said the summary of all our Vedas and Upanishads, in one line, that God alone is the doer and He alone is the bestower. She didn't have knowledge about Bhagvad Gita, about the chakras, about the shakti, yet her simple faith on her Vitthala spoke volumes about her heart's beauty.
These uneducated women understand the Lord and his ways, more than us, we who consider ourselves, so educated and scholastic. That night as I slept I muttered a silent prayer of gratitude to the Lord for making me understand the beauty of his creation.
At the end of the trip, I learnt to value everything in life... Good, bad, joy, sorrow, everything is a gift from the Lord. Only when we have the serenity and humility to accept everything as a gift from him, do we actually finish our pilgrimage from the Jivatma to the Paramatma....
I returned home, tanned, tired and wiser!!
Although the goal of this journey was spiritual, the experience was divine in its own way. Dindi is a piligrimage undertaken by Maharashtrian warkaris, from Alandi and Dehu road, carrying the Padukas or sandals of the great marathi saints, Jnyandev and Tukaram to Pandharpur, the abode of Lord Vitthala. This piligrimage is done on foot, by thousands of devotees in the month of Ashadha, when the gates of heaven are considered open. The piligrims, reach, Pandharpur on Ashadhi Ekadeshi, where they take darshan of their Lord and thus fulfill, their desires. Being a mumbaichi mulgi, I have always been enchanted by the devotion and determination of these warkaris, and when I got a chance to be one amongst them, I jumped with glee..
Around 850, sai devotees from Maharashtra, walked from dharmavaram (in Andhra Pradesh) to Puttaparthy, the abode of Sri sathya sai baba. I was lucky to be one of the volunteers, taking care of these people while walking this distance of close to 40 Km. Although compared to the pandharpur dindi, which takes about 15 days to reach, we reached in a mere 2.5 days.. But the experience was beyond description.
Maximum crowd for the dindi came from rural maharashtra, from remote villages of Chandrapur, Parbhani, Wardha and also from cities like Nasik, kolhapur & Jalgaon. Being the youngest lady volunteer, I got a lot of chance to interact with these people, to know about their likes and dislikes. It is truly said that India lives in villages. To know the real Indian culture, one needs to visit and spend time in the hamlets of India. I always knew about virtues like humility and forgiveness in a very abstract manner... But I understood the real meaning of these virtues when I got a chance to mix amongst these people. Purity of heart is resplendent in every act of these people. We had women over the age of 60's walking as if there was no tomorrow. Singing the devotional folk songs about Lord Vitthoba and dancing in His glory, they made every minute of this endeavour rejoice able. we used to walk in the hot afternoons, and "Miss Fussy Unlimited" as my family knows me, when I saw the simplicity of these people, I didn't care about any of my logics.. Gone were my sun screen lotions in the depths of my bag, our legs ached, our bodies were sore, yet we ate only after confirming that every villager was fed to his heart's content. I never knew that I could manage to clean after walking for 16 Km, wait till 800 people ate, served them and then have food. It was as if all of us were rediscovering ourselves.
On one particular occasion, after walking a distance of 16 Km, we reached a hamlet, not far from our destination. The food arrived very late that night, we were all extremely exhausted, all the children, old women everyone was very hungry. But not a sound of cribbing anywhere... When we apologised to them, about the delay in the food a very old lady, with a smiling face said, "Vitthal has called us and he is the giver", you and I are mere instruments in his divine hands.
With tears in my eyes I served the lady food. She had said the summary of all our Vedas and Upanishads, in one line, that God alone is the doer and He alone is the bestower. She didn't have knowledge about Bhagvad Gita, about the chakras, about the shakti, yet her simple faith on her Vitthala spoke volumes about her heart's beauty.
These uneducated women understand the Lord and his ways, more than us, we who consider ourselves, so educated and scholastic. That night as I slept I muttered a silent prayer of gratitude to the Lord for making me understand the beauty of his creation.
At the end of the trip, I learnt to value everything in life... Good, bad, joy, sorrow, everything is a gift from the Lord. Only when we have the serenity and humility to accept everything as a gift from him, do we actually finish our pilgrimage from the Jivatma to the Paramatma....
I returned home, tanned, tired and wiser!!
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Where Dreams still come true!
She always dreamed, it was as if a birth right for her. A dream to set things right, a dream to make someone smile. A very simple girl, with the prettiest smile I have ever seen. She had a face of one amongst many, nothing so distinctive that would make you look back again, yet there was something in those eyes which made her stand out in the crowd. With a smile and her soothing voice she made magic in people's lives. She wasn't stubborn or adamant, but dedicated. She was never opinionated but highly principled.
She always said the earth is a very beautiful place to live in and the people around us are wonderful. It is just that their eyes are closed and hence they find the world dark and are lonely. All we need to do is, open our eyes to reality and there lies our happiness. As they say, God always tests your fundamental principles and so happened with her. One day a young teenager came to her clinic(she is a doctor) and joined her as a compounder. While chatting with her, she came to know that the girl came from a slum area. She left school in 6th standard, to start earning for her family. On coaxing the girl a lot, she agreed to give her 10th standard board exams.
What followed next was 6 months of rigorous training to the girl, who had practically started living with my friend. She would not sleep more than 4-6 hours a day. All her thoughts were to make this young girl, clear her SSC. Her efforts were laughed upon by her fellow doctors saying, this girl has forgotten her basic studies too and that my friend was kicking in the air for nothing. She smiled but kept on doing her duty. When she was disappointed we her friends were always there to give her courage & motivate her.
After months of this ordeal, today her efforts paid, the girl cleared her 10th standard exam, passed with a measly score, yet something she can be proud of. I have never seen my friend more happier. People dream & their dreams come true, but there are good samaritans, who dream for others and make their dream come true.
Inhi mein rab dikhta hai.....
She always said the earth is a very beautiful place to live in and the people around us are wonderful. It is just that their eyes are closed and hence they find the world dark and are lonely. All we need to do is, open our eyes to reality and there lies our happiness. As they say, God always tests your fundamental principles and so happened with her. One day a young teenager came to her clinic(she is a doctor) and joined her as a compounder. While chatting with her, she came to know that the girl came from a slum area. She left school in 6th standard, to start earning for her family. On coaxing the girl a lot, she agreed to give her 10th standard board exams.
What followed next was 6 months of rigorous training to the girl, who had practically started living with my friend. She would not sleep more than 4-6 hours a day. All her thoughts were to make this young girl, clear her SSC. Her efforts were laughed upon by her fellow doctors saying, this girl has forgotten her basic studies too and that my friend was kicking in the air for nothing. She smiled but kept on doing her duty. When she was disappointed we her friends were always there to give her courage & motivate her.
After months of this ordeal, today her efforts paid, the girl cleared her 10th standard exam, passed with a measly score, yet something she can be proud of. I have never seen my friend more happier. People dream & their dreams come true, but there are good samaritans, who dream for others and make their dream come true.
Inhi mein rab dikhta hai.....
Monday, May 18, 2009
Death be not proud....
Thought of blogging away today as I wait for my hubby to come and have dinner. And came across a very famous poetry by John Donne. I used to love this since school... Especially the last line.. "Death, Thou shalt die"...
Death Be Not Proud
Death be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for, thou art not so,
For, those, whom thou think'st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and souls deliver.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy, or charms can make us sleep as well,
And better then thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.
Death Be Not Proud
Death be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for, thou art not so,
For, those, whom thou think'st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and souls deliver.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy, or charms can make us sleep as well,
And better then thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
A handful of thoughts
Life is a simple & a straight thread... The more we try to slacken it, the more we end up making it complicated and knotty. It is up to a human whether or not to live happily. After all, you are the captain of your ship. No one on this planet earth is bad, no one is as cruel as we think. It is just the thought flow and the circumstances that makes people behave funny. When we contemplate on this seriously, we realize how much we brand other people under categories of "Never to interact ever", "Mean, Disgusting" and so on, but coolly never ever bother to stop and wonder what could be the root cause of such behaviors.
It is said a human soul is a divine spark, it is the jivatma, a fragment of the paramatma... Just like a drop of ocean is as pure and beautiful as the mighty ocean, so is the human soul. Just like the Divine Father is beauty and compassion personified, so is the human heart. It is said in Vedas, that this Universe, is a living entity, just like us.. If the super set is so beautiful then how can we as its subset be a black sheep.
Even as we look back in to our epics, we encounter the so called villains like " Kaikeyi","Ravana" and so many others... Are these people real synonymous to cruelty. Consider the case of Kaikeyi, the step mother of Lord Rama. The thought of her son being just a second fiddle and disrespected in the mighty empire, made her do the gruesome sin of exiling Rama. But she had a good side too. Her valor and intelligence saved Raja Dasharatha in the war. Ravana was said to be the greatest devotee of Lord Shiva ever. It was his ego and arrogance of losing at the svyamvar of Sita that made him kidnap her.
These thoughts came to my mind when I was talking to a friend last weekend. I was advising her against taking up too many responsibilities outside of home and leaving her child to a nanny. I used to always categorize her under the "Egoistic and power crazy" branch. But when I spoke to her I understood how she was running away from the agony of having lost a child prior to this one. The wounded heart, made her tread paths & speak words which she would otherwise never foray into. I am a judgmental person, I tend to put people under various branches and my behavior changes. But with this incident I realized how wrong I was. That day I walked back home with a heavy heart as I had cut away so many relations from my life just because of not understanding what lied beneath the superficial behavior I was seeing in other people. Was I a right person to judge someone else. Is my slate clean to comment on someone else s? The human mind is a monkey, unless tamed can be a big hazard in a man's path to reach destination.
Life no doubt is a good teacher... :)
It is said a human soul is a divine spark, it is the jivatma, a fragment of the paramatma... Just like a drop of ocean is as pure and beautiful as the mighty ocean, so is the human soul. Just like the Divine Father is beauty and compassion personified, so is the human heart. It is said in Vedas, that this Universe, is a living entity, just like us.. If the super set is so beautiful then how can we as its subset be a black sheep.
Even as we look back in to our epics, we encounter the so called villains like " Kaikeyi","Ravana" and so many others... Are these people real synonymous to cruelty. Consider the case of Kaikeyi, the step mother of Lord Rama. The thought of her son being just a second fiddle and disrespected in the mighty empire, made her do the gruesome sin of exiling Rama. But she had a good side too. Her valor and intelligence saved Raja Dasharatha in the war. Ravana was said to be the greatest devotee of Lord Shiva ever. It was his ego and arrogance of losing at the svyamvar of Sita that made him kidnap her.
These thoughts came to my mind when I was talking to a friend last weekend. I was advising her against taking up too many responsibilities outside of home and leaving her child to a nanny. I used to always categorize her under the "Egoistic and power crazy" branch. But when I spoke to her I understood how she was running away from the agony of having lost a child prior to this one. The wounded heart, made her tread paths & speak words which she would otherwise never foray into. I am a judgmental person, I tend to put people under various branches and my behavior changes. But with this incident I realized how wrong I was. That day I walked back home with a heavy heart as I had cut away so many relations from my life just because of not understanding what lied beneath the superficial behavior I was seeing in other people. Was I a right person to judge someone else. Is my slate clean to comment on someone else s? The human mind is a monkey, unless tamed can be a big hazard in a man's path to reach destination.
Life no doubt is a good teacher... :)
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
An unplanned Planner list...
This is not one of my blogs when I have again come up with an imaginary story or a situation, never ever to be found in life. But today, I am simply so confused and am feeling so claustrophobic, that blogging seems my only way out.
Right from my childhood, I have always been known as a timetable person.. Its a term, my friends from engg gave me for my immense planning techniques... I always believed in planning my life even my day, the previous day and never let anything affect it whatsoever. Planner, control freak, these weren't simply adjectives to describe me but seemed synonymous to my name. I am used to planning to such an extent, that I have contingency plans too... As in, if my plan for the day ever failed due to some reason, I always had a Plan B. My roomie used to joke saying even my dreams would be planned... :)
Although my habits were always a matter of joke to people, I always stuck by them and it paid off well.. I had a good time at work, because of my planning methods. My colleagues and superiors were always in awe that even in stringent work time lines, my work never sagged behind.. I don't remember, leaving my office ever late And every evening I spent extra timing, writing out my Task list for the next day...
And then one fine day, my life simply went haywire, when a plan of mine backfired, suddenly new plans came rushing in... Within an year, all that I had planned went completely messed and m at my wits end, handling the situation now.
Although my routine has got set, life seems to take no proper direction.. I have absolutely no idea what I want from life... All my short time goals seems achieved and I have no long term goal at all... I have this void feeling in my heart which freaks me... Nothing seems to make me happy, yet there is this big 1000 Watt smile on my face... Everywhere I go, I feel people are mocking at me... I have big time lost my self confidence... Things which I felt are good in me seem like a hype now. I am a stranger to my own self now. I am desperately bored and am wasting time like hell... Too many options in front of me and nothing seems to appeal.
Life is so unpredictable... Waiting for my ray of hope which will redefine my life...
Till then Lost in space....
Right from my childhood, I have always been known as a timetable person.. Its a term, my friends from engg gave me for my immense planning techniques... I always believed in planning my life even my day, the previous day and never let anything affect it whatsoever. Planner, control freak, these weren't simply adjectives to describe me but seemed synonymous to my name. I am used to planning to such an extent, that I have contingency plans too... As in, if my plan for the day ever failed due to some reason, I always had a Plan B. My roomie used to joke saying even my dreams would be planned... :)
Although my habits were always a matter of joke to people, I always stuck by them and it paid off well.. I had a good time at work, because of my planning methods. My colleagues and superiors were always in awe that even in stringent work time lines, my work never sagged behind.. I don't remember, leaving my office ever late And every evening I spent extra timing, writing out my Task list for the next day...
And then one fine day, my life simply went haywire, when a plan of mine backfired, suddenly new plans came rushing in... Within an year, all that I had planned went completely messed and m at my wits end, handling the situation now.
Although my routine has got set, life seems to take no proper direction.. I have absolutely no idea what I want from life... All my short time goals seems achieved and I have no long term goal at all... I have this void feeling in my heart which freaks me... Nothing seems to make me happy, yet there is this big 1000 Watt smile on my face... Everywhere I go, I feel people are mocking at me... I have big time lost my self confidence... Things which I felt are good in me seem like a hype now. I am a stranger to my own self now. I am desperately bored and am wasting time like hell... Too many options in front of me and nothing seems to appeal.
Life is so unpredictable... Waiting for my ray of hope which will redefine my life...
Till then Lost in space....
Friday, November 28, 2008
When Hell descended on Earth
It has been 48 hours since people have been glued to their television sets all across India watching every move of the biggest horror unfolding in front of our eyes. Never has Mumbai been pulled down so badly, but here what we see is cold blooded devils simply massacring innocent lives for some really stupid goal, possibly a jargon that they themselves don't understand. It is time someone put some sense into these egghead's brains, that they cant achieve heaven by breaking hell loose on earth. WE agree that we belong to a city which never sleeps, but hello!! We do have a heart and it hurts, seeing our top cops dying away like that, seeing our fellow brothers and sisters falling prey to a mass murder, seeing our heritage buildings burning away and all for satisfying someones stupid mission. Mumbaikars have been very resilient all through, yes we do have an undying spirit of coming back with the same spirit again & again no matter how much we are hit, but this time, we have lost a lot. The spirit needs to turn into anger, a revolution has to come about, how long are we simply going to light candles in remembrance of people who have laid down their lives. It is about time, we came over mere political issues and have the guts to take terrorism to its ultimate end.
This is the same feeling that people felt in USA after the September 11 blasts. Whether Mumbai, New York or some other city in the world, people are losing their sense of security, we no longer feel safe in our own homes. You never know when a celebration dinner could actually turn into a big mourning for the family. This time, the impact is very high and it has hit big time. Earlier, after the blasts in the train or the buses, people in mumbai still continued to travel by these the next day on... Life didn't halt. In fact I was one of them, travelling by the same local the next day. But this time, things are different. Even the smallest sounds are creating panic among people. For a city which is famous for its bindaas attitude, a petty tyre burst can make us duck with fear. That is the scene now. A city where we used to comment that we don't even have time to breathe, it is about time, we all stand up and tell our politicians to shut up and watch the show. It is time, the culprits are really removed from their burrows and put to death.
In hindsight, think about the parents, of these terrorists, what pain they would they be undergoing; Watching their kids choose death over life. What is it which woos these young men to choose death, what makes them deaf to the cries of pain and pleas and still press the trigger. A particular video tape was telecast today, showing two of the terrorists smiling at each other and killing innocent people recklessly. How do these people face their conscience or do they actually have one.
Tears stream my eyes as I think about all those brave men, who laid their lives for the sake of this city, fighting and protecting us. They died so we could live. In this moment of despair, it is their spirit and bravery that keeps us going. Mumbaikars are more angry with the death of our bravehearts than the terrorism act. If only this could all come to an end, if only humans start behaving like one...
This is the same feeling that people felt in USA after the September 11 blasts. Whether Mumbai, New York or some other city in the world, people are losing their sense of security, we no longer feel safe in our own homes. You never know when a celebration dinner could actually turn into a big mourning for the family. This time, the impact is very high and it has hit big time. Earlier, after the blasts in the train or the buses, people in mumbai still continued to travel by these the next day on... Life didn't halt. In fact I was one of them, travelling by the same local the next day. But this time, things are different. Even the smallest sounds are creating panic among people. For a city which is famous for its bindaas attitude, a petty tyre burst can make us duck with fear. That is the scene now. A city where we used to comment that we don't even have time to breathe, it is about time, we all stand up and tell our politicians to shut up and watch the show. It is time, the culprits are really removed from their burrows and put to death.
In hindsight, think about the parents, of these terrorists, what pain they would they be undergoing; Watching their kids choose death over life. What is it which woos these young men to choose death, what makes them deaf to the cries of pain and pleas and still press the trigger. A particular video tape was telecast today, showing two of the terrorists smiling at each other and killing innocent people recklessly. How do these people face their conscience or do they actually have one.
Tears stream my eyes as I think about all those brave men, who laid their lives for the sake of this city, fighting and protecting us. They died so we could live. In this moment of despair, it is their spirit and bravery that keeps us going. Mumbaikars are more angry with the death of our bravehearts than the terrorism act. If only this could all come to an end, if only humans start behaving like one...
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